The Generics

So are you planning a Men's Retreat? Gospel Meeting? Lectureship? Marriage Seminar? As you envision the perfect event several big named people come into mind: Patrick Mead, Rubel Shelly, Mike Cope, Randy Harris...The list goes on. You want a name that people recognize and that will draw crowds. The only problem is that these guys are booked for the next 5 years and flying them in can get expensive. Never fear we have a solution!

We are the Generics. We are a group of guys who no one has heard of, with decent qualifications, and an open calendar. We specialize in ANY topic. You heard me right, ANY topic. We believe that the internet is a tool that needs to be used more in ministry. We know how to do the research (Google, SermonCentral.com, etc.) and our unique delivery styles can never be matched (trust me).

Let me introduce our team:

On the far left (and I do mean the far left) we have Ken Finzer. He is originally from Ohio but now resides in Mississippi. His main emphasis is in worship, budget, and prison ministry.
He received his practical experience from spending some time in prison for money laundering. He found the Lord behind bars and has been singing His praises since that time. He is currently writing a book entitled "Do Not Pass Go: When Monopoly Is No Longer A Game."

In the "middle" we have Michael Jones. He is originally from TN but currently resides in AR. His main emphasis is in counseling, youth, and racial reconciliation ministry. He has taken classes at several prestigious universities, but has not managed to graduate from any of them. We believe this helps him keep his view of diversity. He has been fired by only two churches in his 13 years of ministry. He is currently working on a book entitled "What Not To Do In Ministry: A Short History of Michael Jones' Resume" His winning smile and humor will be an added benefit to any event.

On the EXTREME right we have Benjiman Kirven. He is originally from OH but now resides in Virginia Beach, VA. His main emphasis is on involvement and pulpit ministry. He is the most sound of our group. He does most of his messages directly from the KJV only. He has it memorized (thus sayeth the Lord). He has been fighting against the slippery slope of eating in the church building and using multiple cups during Communion for years. His new book "Being Silent Where The Bible Is Silent Is Difficult When You Have Much To Say" will be hitting the shelves this Fall.

So you see we have you covered! Regardless of the event, topic, doctrine, or tradition, we have someone who can take care of your needs. We are low maintenance, under trained, and cheap.

See what others have said about us:

"Not bad. That is all I have to say..not bad, but not real good" (Anonymous)

"Patrick Mead got sick at the last minute and we had no idea what to do. The Generics came in and took care of us. Honestly I had heard the illustrations before, but at least we did not have to cancel the event" (Anonymous)

"I have heard all the big name speakers out there. We really wanted Randy Harris, but it was hard to book him. The Generics are no Randy Harris, but they kept the audience awake" (Anonymous)

"I hate to use golfing terminology, but these guys were a bogey. In my book a bogey is better than a triple bogey any day." (Anonymous)

Don't wait call now!

And remember....
"When Decent Is All You Can Afford, Think Generics!"